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Thursday, January 20, 2005

There are times in your life when you know that too much has happened to not say something about, where the things you miss take over your heart, the people you love need you more than ever, and the things you do only fill you up so far with satisfaction, when you realize that while things couldnt be better in almost everything, something is still missing.......and you cant drink or smoke it away, you cant laugh at it anymore and expect it not to hurt, and the "that was then, this is now" speech, which your friends never believed, even becomes farsical to yourself. How do you move on from something that your entire body craved for so long, when even after all this time of being without, you still find yourself addicted? How do you say no to something you never had the chance to say yes to, even though the question hasnt been asked? How do you miss someone who has already more than moved on from you, who has shared herself with another, yet when you speak to her, you can still "see" and "hear" her blushing on the other end of the line? How is it that your charm works so well on one person, and yet everyone else sees you as cocky and arrogant? What if all the changes youve made over the past 2 years have done nothing than put you further behind than you started off? Not that too many people ever really read this.....i just dont update it enough, but there is a messge to one person i need to make.......Christine, i love you, ive never stopped, only tried to fool myself and you into thinking that i had........ i need to give you these words......"Moon so bright, night so fine, Keep your heart here with mine, Life`s a dream we are dreaming, Race the moon, catch the wind, Ride the night to the end, Seize the day, stand up for the light, I want to spend my lifetime loving you, If that is all in life I ever do, Heroes rise, heroes fall, Rise again, win it all, In your heart, can`t you feel the glory? Through our joy, through our pain, We can move worlds again, Take my hand, dance the dance with me, I want to spend my lifetime loving you, If that is all in life I ever do, I will want nothing else to see me through, If I can spend my lifetime loving you, Though we know we will never come again, Where there is love, life begins, Over and over again, Save the night, save the day, Save the love, come what may, Love is worth everything we pay" If you remember this, if you remember anything or everything we shared.......please call me, dont ask me why but ive just become afraid. When you are sad, i am sad, when you are happy, I am smiling, and when your heart calls mine, i will answer.






It dark, lonely, and cold in this heart without you to warm it...............mein Schatze, mein lied, mein liebe, mein leben.